THIS CLOSET

Everyday I wake up and get my clothes from THIS CLOSET. There is one thing I want more than anything else in the world… a walk-in closet. I have “closet envy” when I go to someone’s house and see their big, walk-in closet. When I first got married and moved to this house, this was my husband’s closet and my clothes were in a bigger closet in a spare bedroom. But then we started having kids and the spare bedroom became my daughter’s room and that closet became her closet. So my husband moved his clothes and I got THIS CLOSET.

The truth is… I still had clothes and shoes in my daughter’s closet 

But last year I moved all my stuff to my room. I donated bags and bags of clothes, shoes, and coats to the Salvation Army. I only kept the things I wore on a regular basis. Only the things that would fit in THIS CLOSET. Although I was able to let go of all the clothes and shoes I no longer wear, I still wake up everyday and say to myself, “It sure would be nice if I had a BIGGER CLOSET”. I think about all the new suits I can buy. All the new purses I can carry. All the new shoes I can wear.

I’m NOT satisfied with THIS CLOSET

I want something BIGGER

I want something BETTER

The truth is…there are a lot of CLOSETS in my life. A lot of things that I want more of. Things that I want to be BIGGER and BETTER.  A better career. A better car. A better house. A bigger driveway. A bigger paycheck. Better skin.      

However, I know this mindset doesn’t serve me well. So, as I step into 2017, I don’t want to accumulate more things. I don’t want to fill my CLOSET with more stuff. I don’t want to focus on BIGGER and BETTER. I want to be satisfied with who I am and what I have.

I want to be CONTENT

In his letter to the church of Phillipi, Paul says, “Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need” (Philippians 4:11-12 New American Standard Bible). 

Lord, thank you for all of the things I DO have. I don’t have everything I want, but I do have everything I need. Help me to be satisfied with my life the way it currently is. Help me to be CONTENT

 

 

 

 

Smaller Bin

Two weeks before Christmas my husband came to me and said, “I found a huge bin in the basement with all kinds of wrapping paper, boxes, Christmas cards, bows, and gift bags in it. You should really look in the box. You don’t need to buy anything else.” I went downstairs and couldn’t believe all the items that were in that bin. Most of the things in the bin were 10 years old. And you could tell. The adhesive on the bows didn’t stick anymore. The colors on the gift boxes were starting to fade. And the wrapping paper had a layer of soot on it from being in a box by the furnace for the last decade.

The truth is… I forgot all about that bin 

I spent the next few hours going through everything

And I decided… I’m not going into 2017 with all this OLD STUFF

I gave rolls and rolls of wrapping paper to family and friends. I put presents in gift boxes, then wrapped them, then put them in gift bags just so I could use all the things I’ve accumulated over the years. Even after trying my hardest to use everything, I still had things left over.

There were a few remnants

I said to myself, “I’ll use the rest of the stuff next Christmas. It’s okay if I bring a few of these things into next year. I can’t LET GO of all this stuff.”

So I packed them up in a smaller bin

However, I wasn’t able to get the “smaller bin” off my mind

Why am I trying to take all these “old things” into a “new year”? Why is it so hard for me to LET GO? 

The truth is… I don’t know 

But I do know… I don’t want 2017 to be filled with bows that don’t stick, boxes that are fading, and wrapping paper that doesn’t feel right

So I emptied the “smaller bin” into a garbage bag and dropped it off at the local thrift store

I don’t want 2017 to be filled with remnants of 2016

Lord, help me realize when I’m making “smaller bins” in my life. Don’t let me hold on to things that You’ve already instructed me to get rid of. Help me to LET GO of things that that no longer have purpose in my life. Help me to make more room for you.

 

One Me

Lion’s Head

It’s 3:00 AM/EST and I can’t sleep. This is my first night in the US after a week in South Africa and my body is adjusting back to the eastern standard time zone. So, I’m awake. Wide awake.

I’m thinking a lot about my next blog post. I typically post it by Tuesday. It’s Thursday. I’m already behind. I’m also not sure what to write about. Where to begin. This past week was an amazing experience and I’m overwhelmed. There are so many thoughts running through my head. I’m trying to grab one and hold on to it long enough to formulate a coherent thought. But it’s hard. Almost impossible.

The truth is… I need to make some shifts 

When I started out on this journey, I was concerned about traveling by myself. Although I knew people who would be at the conference I was attending, most of my trip would be spent alone. I thought it was going to be scary. I thought I was going to be afraid. At moments throughout my trip, I didn’t have anyone around to ask their opinion or get their perspective. I was forced to think and reflect on my own. I was forced to be by myself.

The truth is… something amazing happens when you experience critical moments of life in the stillness of your “own thoughts” – your own perspective

The most breathtaking moment for me was going to Table Mountain in Cape Town. It’s the most beautiful place I’ve ever been. I had an amazing view of Cape Town while riding up the cable way and when I stepped out on the mountain – I felt a peace and stillness that I’ve never experienced before. I spent the next three hours on the mountain – by myself. Thinking. Praying. Reflecting.

The truth is… I’ve been too busy standing on the sidelines watching other people’s lives that I haven’t played enough of my own

I often think to myself, “It’s not a big deal if I don’t do it – someone else will”

While on Table Mountain, I was particularly drawn to Lion’s Head. I must have taken a hundred pictures of it from all different angles. It doesn’t matter where you are in Cape Town, you can distinctly see Lion’s Head from all the other mountains. It stands out. It’s one of a kind.

On that mountain, in the most beautiful place I’ve ever been, God reminded me that there is only ONE ME. That I’m unique and different. That there is no one else on earth that can do what HE is calling me to do. I can’t be replicated and I’m not replaceable. There is no substitute, no backup, no fill-in, no proxy, no stand-in, no surrogate, or alternate that can take my place.

If I don’t live out my own, unique purpose in life – it will not be done

Because NO ONE else is equipped to do it, there is only ONE ME